Friday, 13 December 2013

#13 - Follow Your Bliss

Greetings Beautiful People

Hope you're well and that you enjoy this week's post.





1) QOTW
"Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it.”
Steve Jobs


2) Story – My Work
When I started secondary school my favourite subjects were English and PE but most of my lessons were so boring I’d sit in class drawing pictures, passing notes or daydreaming about being a superhero.

(Actually I wanted my right arm to be bionic as I figured that would give me an edge but not make things too easy). As time went on this vision somehow became replaced by the image of me having my own office, a hot secretary, and being very important. I have no idea when this shift took place.

By the time I entered the workplace many years later I was in an office, but I was sharing it with 6 other people and I didn’t have a hot secretary. I was working in brand communications, I had no idea what I really wanted to do but I thought PR might allow me to write and be creative. As it turned out writing press releases didn’t exactly light my fire and I found I didn’t really fit into that whole world. My next role was corporate, European Project Manager (which sounded quite impressive when I was introducing myself) but while I enjoyed the challenge and newfound status and excelled at the work, the role and the office politics didn’t appeal to me. From this point on I decided to take roles which were less demanding giving me the time and headspace to pursue my real interests in my spare time.

I sort of fell into admin work while temping and didn't climb out of it for the next decade. I worked as a PA by day and in the evenings and on weekends I’d be up to all sorts of cool stuff: fronting a hip-hop band, studying martial arts, learning hypnotherapy, partying. In this way I acquired a number of different skill-sets and found a counterpoint to the repetitive routine of work.


Then a few years back my friend Bonus invited me to the boxing gym where she trained. Once I got over the initial fear of being punched in the face (by of course getting punched in the face) I fell in love with the art and science of boxing. I’d initially started because although I’d boxed when I was younger and trained in several martial arts I still had a fear of fighting which I couldn’t die with. I wanted to test myself, to see what I had inside when the chips were down. Would I crumble, or rise to the challenge like Rocky? I discovered courage I didn’t know I had, often sparring people that would outweigh me by 30-50 pounds and cornering them. I was even lucky enough to share the ring with a few pros and one world champion, which was equal parts fun and terrifying. 


There are no words to express how alive you feel when you’re in a boxing ring - it makes normal life seem like anaesthesia. Adrenaline courses through your veins making you 20% stronger and faster, your mind is razor sharp and your senses are heightened. Like Wolverine. I can hear a conversation 20ft away outside the ring when I’m sparring and I can sense where spectators are positioned and even feel their mood. In a world where our attention is increasingly fragmented as we multi-task ourselves silly boxing is one of those rare things which demands 100% presence of mind.

I threw myself into training from once per week to twice per week until I was at the gym most days till closing. All the while the “Voice of Reason” was asking me what I thought I was doing. Who the hell starts boxing at 34? That’s when boxers retire! Where are you going with this? It felt selfish, to just do it because I enjoyed it. With my BA, with hypnotherapy and Quantum Touch etc  I knew I was working towards qualifications but with boxing there was no end game and just doing it because I loved it felt a bit…weird. 

But because of that love I learned super-quick. I researched constantly. I found out how pros trained and copied them, I studied film of fighters going back to the 1930’s, I bought the Rocky soundtrack and ran to it and I asked every good trainer or fighter I met questions. After a few years I’d won two white collar fights and began to help beginners at the gym here and there – I found I could see things. One day I picked up the focus mitts and taught one young fighter for about 30 minutes straight. It felt strangely familiar, like I’d done it before. I quickly found a rhythm and I experienced what writer Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi calls “flow”.



The time flew. Training and sparring are still my favourite things in the world but when I left the gym that night I felt clean and exhilarated. It was a high I’d never experienced before. I think because I had given something rather than just training myself there was a purity to the feeling and a knowing that I and perhaps that boxer had grown a little in the process. It was the purest example of service I could remember, doing what I love and helping someone else in the process.

It’s no longer enough for me to squeeze the things I love into a few hours here and there. Life is too short. I now have a boxing coaching qualification, a few clients and a number of creative projects bubbling away including of course, the w0nd3r.

Today I typed up the actions for a meeting, but it was MY meeting.

As far as money goes:

“Success does not come from making money, making money comes from success and success is in direct proportion to our service. Most people have this law backwards.”
Earl Nightingale, The Strangest Secret

Doing what I love once seemed selfish or self-indulgent to me but it’s that love that makes you go the extra mile to try and do great work, so I might be planning a training session or researching and writing for 6 hours straight but it’s a labour of love. I think each one of us has something that we are uniquely suited to doing and that is our work. I’m still learning the specifics of what mine involves but life gets better each day as I get more clarity.

As Mr Jobbs said: “If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking….” and If you have found it I say be grateful and keep enjoying it because you're luckier than most. For me the starting point was just doing more of what I love.

I guess my favourite subjects are still English and PE...maybe we just complicate things sometimes.



What’s your bliss?

Please comment below and share.

Thanks
Dx



3) Documentary "Finding Joe" (Campbell) Trailer:
 

4) Song - Ninja Tunes by Cinematic Orchestra w/Jolly Mukherjee (wait till the beat drops)




Recommended Reading
Links to "Be Happy: Follow Your Smile": Amazon UK / Amazon US 

Best book I have ever read - 42 pages and only £0.77/$1.22(!)

12 comments:

  1. That's a pretty inspiring story there Dave, and I think you hit the nail on the head when you acknowledge that 'counterpoint' to life and striving to lift your head space to elevate your mind with creative pursuits.

    My bliss? I have to say with all honesty, that it comes to me when swimming out doors in a lake or the sea. Having trained for a few years to compete in some Triathlons and one Ironman competition, I surprised myself when I developed the 'rhythm' for swimming and could just swim for 60mins+ without needing to stop. The wave of clarity that enters my mind during such an outing has rarely been matched.....legally anyway!

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    Replies
    1. :) Thanks Bernie. I'm glad you can relate, I think most of us underestimate our need and ability to create.

      I remember you talking to me about swimming. Again I can relate to that kind of flow state too, when I'm boxing I often hit a 'rhythm' where something clicks and I feel like I could just train forever. I also have it when writing and walking, but that tends to be more like a meditative state when ideas come to me. Cheers for the comment champ!

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    2. D,

      You never cease to amaze me with your insights. You really have a gift for expressing the spiritual dimension ... in a way that takes my breath away.

      Call us, when you need to come on down to 'the shire' to get some fresh air, a walk (or bike ride), good conversation and some fine hoe-action!

      Love to all,
      Bill

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    3. As I live and breathe - Mr Miller!

      I didn't even know you read these.

      Thank you so much for your feedback - talk about fuel for the fire. I'll be writing up a storm tonight :)

      And thank you for your kind offer, it's not every day a man gets offered fresh air, hospitality AND some fine hoe-action ha ha.

      Love to you and Aunt S
      Dx

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  2. David my good you're maturing beautifully,
    Knock and the door will open,
    Seek and you will find,
    Ask and you shall receive.
    Keep up the good work.
    Work with your feelings, not against them
    Keep your eye on the big picture
    Fail giving your all and all will be given to you.

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    Replies
    1. Thanks very much Tony. You confirmed another thing I've just learned. Either give 100% or don't bother. Peace

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  3. Woooop Wooooop!!! Loving this (and every) edition of The Wonder!!! Thank youuu and Continued Blessings of Clarity, Positive Self Expression and Living your Dreams!!! XX

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    Replies
    1. She's back and exclamation marks are not safe!

      Thanks babe. Right back at you, looking forward to hearing your next wave of music.

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  4. Rocky was filmed in Philadelphia, so I think a visit to Philly might be on the cards. I can pretend to be a machine-like Soviet fighter if that helps things along.

    This is Christine and I don't know why my name is coming up as "Documentary Curriculum."

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    Replies
    1. That's hilarious, my friend Max will be working on a boxing doc on the East Coast so I thought it was him for a minute. That would be cool, drop me an email and let me know how you and the fam are settling in.

      Thanks for the comment.
      Dx

      Delete
  5. Very inspiring bro. I'm very proud of your progression. You have finally found what you want to do in life. I see you on the road to success.

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  6. Thanks champ, much appreciated :)

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